Well, this DA page was made on MLK Day, and I’m glad it was. That day, I felt good because I spent that day with Gammy. All we did was go shopping at WalMart, then we went walking around a few other stores. That day I bought my TracFone and also I bought a color cartridge for my printer. I felt good with my purchases that day, as well as downtime with Gammy. The rest of this week has been so-so. Ever since Dad left us last Friday Mom’s been really depressed. And I’ve been feeling like shit. Everything’s all thrown on ME now. On Thursday night, Ricky was acting up again like he always does, and Mom said (while she was crying) “One of these days, Ricky, I’m going to overdose on my insulin and I’ll die. Don’t make me go that far!” After she said that that night I felt like shit. I felt so fucked up. I wanted to scream. All I did was look at her. Then I went to my room as she was crying, as I hate seeing people cry. Later on that night she told Ricky (and me) that she would never do anything that stupid, that she just missed Dad. Mainly it was about Ricky’s behavior, but still. So, like I said, everything falls on me now. During these past few days, I’ve had to cook, clean, watch over Ricky, look after Mom; and at night I feel so tired. I wish things were easier on my family. I wish things were easier on me.

I wish I could freely express my love to my fiancée without having to hide it.

Yes, I’m engaged to be married to Jessica L. Roth, and I couldn’t be any fucking happier!
Maybe that’s what’s holding me down. Yes, that’s exactly it.

OK, so maybe this week isn’t that bad. I’m engaged. Also, Jess might be coming to visit me this summer too. I’ve told Mom everything about us (as did Jess), and Mom thinks it’s great that I have someone who loves me. Not too sure about Dad though, but oh well. So, this year might turn out to be a good year as last year was. I hope so. I really do.

Mainly, I hope to get some things accomplished here.

1. I want to get out of SDCC and go onto SDSU
2. I want to sell my shit for cash (pics up soon)
3. I want to be noticed here on DA; as in someone offering me a job as a writer or something like that.

I need a real job. Just part time though. But I really need money. All I have is a dollar in my bank account, and that dollar is still there. Yesterday I opened up a Paypal account and then I hooked that up with my banking account. Now all I need is money in my Paypal account, that way I can send money from there over into my bank account. I plan to sell all my backpacks. ALL of them! I have so many I want to sell. Good brands too, mainly Jansport, but others as well. As soon as I put up some pics of all of them (once I find my digicamera) I’ll put them up and takers can note me.

School’s coming up soon. 2 classes now equals $120. I’m getting $80 from Jess, so I’ll need $45 then now. The $45 I’ll get from those backpacks I wanna get rid of though.

So, that brings me here to now.